1. I turn 33 on Wednesday. Other notable 33-year-olds include NFL quarterback Drew Brees and “¡Ask a Mexican!” columnist Gustavo Arellano.
2. I was born at 5:30 in the morning, Aug. 8, 1979. Exactly 33 years later, I will be asleep.
3. My father’s birthday is also on Wednesday. So considering us two and the twins, Ma is the only one in the family with her own birthday. I think she did that on purpose.
4. After Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Ma’s birthday, Thing 1’s anniversary, Independence Day, May Day, Labor Day and World Hepatitis Day, my birthday is the ninth most important holiday in the Wallace Family Summer Calendar.
5. Wednesday is also the big-time final proof day for the September issue, for which I supplied approximately 75 percent of the edit (although only four pages of that are actually, like, readable). So I will be celebrating my 33rd birthday by sitting in the kitchen and reading 40 pages worth of really riveting nonprofit listings.
6. The average temperature here during my birthday week will be 33 degrees Celsius. Well, maybe.
7. 33 is a palindrome. And so am I.
8. My 33rd birthday occurs during the 32nd week of the year. Actually, I kind of wish I knew that last year, dammit.
9. On my 33rd birthday, I will weigh exactly 33 times what I weighed when I was born. If I weighed five pounds when I was born. Which I probably didn’t.
10. Since I’m taking Friday off, I’m only working four days this week. And since I’m writing this blog at my desk right now, I’m really not even working that much.