Sunburned and hockey-sore,
Slew-footed tailbone ass-pain
And butthurt: losing sucks.
Puck-bruised (self-inflicted warm-up shots
And others from more legitimate sources),
Leftover pretzels, beer cans, wet gear—
Dear god, the laundry—
Crumpled coozies, sandy coolers,
Reliving recent minor glories and glorious minors,
Oh-so-many missed passes and
Ridiculous, hysterical slips and stumbles,
Collisions, whiffs, fluttered wristers,
A sorority of blue-paint scrums and handshakes,
Of locker room beer and gear-bag ottomans:
Alpha Chica Ow.