And thus I present an analysis of today’s horoscope, based on the fact that I got to leave work early in order to drink a couple beers at one of my favorite places in the world, accomplishing work stuff and even getting quotes in the process, only to have my car sputter and die on the way home, leaving me stranded in a surprisingly questionable neighborhood for AMI, being eaten by mosquitoes and noseeums, waiting an hour for a tow truck and pondering the probable expense and my already skyrocketing credit card bill.
Horoscope for Leo, Oct. 15, 2013: “This is a time for you Lions to do things in a very basic and practical manner.”
Yes. I don’t really have a choice, but perhaps that’s what you meant.
“It’s essential to focus on building your own self-worth, both financially and psychologically.”
See, here’s where I have a problem. I’m failing to see how I can build my financial self-worth by incurring a horrendous expense. And, frankly, that makes me feel bad, psychologically. Perhaps you’re suggesting that I was on a work excursion, and thus should be compensated for a new transmission? Well, yes, that would make me feel quite clever.
“However, your fires of inspiration may be dying down today as Mars leaves lively Leo to enter efficient Virgo.”
I feel like Katy Perry wrote this part.
“It’s not the end of the road…”
Heh, fucking true story. This happened smack-dab in the middle of the road.
“…but rather a transition into a time when considered actions have more impact than the obvious and noisy ones.”
Did you mean a transmission…? (*rimshot?)
Well, I definitely made some obvious and noisy actions upon going all max-RPMs/no-horsepower on rush-hour Gulf Drive (as did my car)—and yes, those were made to no avail. But, having had time to consider, I…still don’t know what action I should take. I’m-a go look for some tea leaves or a Magic 8-Ball or something. If all else, fails, well…I guess I’ll just see what tomorrow’s horoscope has to say.