True Story

Scene: A Bradenton Circle-K. Cash register.

CCB [indicating ME]: She stuck this [free bag of Doritos coupon] to me.

GAS STATION CASHIER: Oh no. Why did she do that?

CCB: She’s pretty mean sometimes.

GAS STATION CASHIER: I bet you deserved it. But I’m divorced, so that’s what I say, haha.

ME: Haha.

GAS STATION CASHIER: Well. I had to lock him up.

ME: …oh?

GAS STATION CASHIER: Yeah. My face hit is fist too many times.

ME: Oh. Well. …Fuck him then.


And then, in our trip out of the parking lot, CCB almost ran over a shirtless guy in a motorized wheelchair.



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3 responses to “True Story

  1. “Fuck him then” is SO much more coherent than I would have been at that. I mean, good for her, but wow.

  2. Doesn’t that kind of thing happen to you kinda often? It seems like it does. You must have one of those personalities where people must SHARE THIS THING THAT HAPPENED TO ME while you’re doing the polite smile with the sideways look at the exit.

    • Heh, I never attributed it to any quality I might have, but hmm, now that you mention it, I’ll take it. Sounds like a good thing for a writer–to encourage people to talk to you. Just call me the Overshare Generator.

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